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14th May Show
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Gennie
10:19
Take this girl for example, the one with the tattered brown dress, the one whith the eyes like a wolfs glowing from the darkness of her mandled hood. what on earth is she.
Phoebe 11 RJS
10:19
See this guy, for example. See him? The one with the darting eyes, yes him. He holds a huge leather briefcase and wont let  it leave his side. It is strange.
Mrs Shirtliff
10:19
Martha - never shows his face. Spooky! How does he walk?
keerat
10:19
take this guy for example the one how has a black and plain white suit with a grey steel glasses. The one who is sneaking around.
Mrs James
10:19
Freya, by using the word striding you add additional information about the man.  Well done.
Sebastien SwW
10:19
Take that guy for example See him? The one with a mango in his hand.
Sachin
10:19
Can't you see him? The guy who has an abnormally large throat. But why?
Krista
10:19
take this guy for example see him the one who’s moving and staring into space
Beabop
10:19
Take this one for example. The one who is wearing a top hat and holding a stick.
arthur richards@oaksey school
10:19
the one who has a  beard that reaches the floor and still drags
Edith
10:19
Take this man for instance. The one who is wearing a a pink coat and purple boots.
Mrs Pearce
10:19
@Nikola - great description - what is your character doing to look miserable? How do we know she is miserable?
Onora
10:19
Take this lady for example, the one who looks like a pretty china doll.
Jack
10:19
The one who is wearing a silk blouse with a bright bow tied at her neck. Her heels tip tapping on the spotless marble floor.
Mr Sutton
10:19
Nice alliteration, Martha.
Mrs James
10:19
Keerat, how did he sneak around?
Utkarsha
10:19
Take this student for example. See her? The one who had a hair that she just got up from bed.
Emily N
10:19
The one who is staring at the church near the graveyard.
Sachi
10:19
And do you see  his leg? It's wobbling  like jelly. What do you think happened to it?
Mr Walker
10:19
Gennie - do you need a question mark at the end?
Arthur
10:19
His leather jacket is wrapped tightly around him, it isn't that cold.
Louis SWW
10:19
Take this man for example, see him? The one who moves steathily across the marbled floor.
Jacob
10:19
Look! Can’t you see! The one who is suspiciously hiding under an umbrella, possibly trying to hide from CCTV.
Olivia st Teresa’s
10:19
See her the one who is wearing the see-through pink jacket. She’s the big boss, she owns the park and the mansion next door.
Chloe -SWW
10:19
No, that one! The one sitting and staring at the chandelier. Now opening his bag. What's he got in there?
Beabop
10:19
As soon as I look at him, he disappears.
jamesmarle
10:19
The one who walks with confidence.
Niamh H
10:20
Take this girl for example. The one in the blue dress. See her? She's all on her own, in the midst of children holding their parents' hands. Who is she? Where's her family?
Charlotte@oaskey
10:20
The shopping centre is packed with mysterious people you never know where they have been, there are people carrying presents for relatives you never know what's going on in the shopping centre... you never know.
Ella from Class 3!
10:20
See him? The one whose bald and has that alarming tattoo on his fore arm
Mrs Pearce
10:20
@Jack I love the tip tapping of the heels.  I can picture your character
Sachin
10:20
The one who strangely eyes every move of the crowd.
Mrs Shirtliff
10:20
Onora - lovely start! Tell me more!
Mr Sutton
10:20
Chloe, nice to end on a question, it has hooked me in.
Gabby B
10:20
Do you see him? You know the one in the swish Amarni suit in this town a bit suspicious right? Walking around, no striding as if he owns the pace with the posh car and bullhead bodyguards.
Britney
10:20
Take this woman for example.  See her?  She's rushing around like her hair is on fire!
Mrs James
10:20
Jacob, by adding CCTV to your sentence, the reader immediately know that your story will be set in contemporary times. Well done.
Mr Sutton
10:20
Lovely sentence, Phoebe.
Harry - SWW.
10:20
Thousands upon thousands of people that are not suspicious. Then take this guy for example weari ng
Felix F
10:20
Take this guy for example. See him? The one who is looking around confused, trying to find his destination in the hustle and bustle of people.
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