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20th May Live Writing
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Issie
10:36
She stares at me suspiciously before diving into the abyss
Jamie Thornton
10:36
Stop right there, As I turned around i saw the police charging at me with there K9 dogs. But then my escape route arrived it was my brother in my sports car that revs furiously in the distance but the police were already next to me...
Jessica
10:36
The smoke cleared, leaving only, not just anything, her worst nightmare.
Mrs Kilgour
10:36
Eliza - great use of 'empty words'!
James
10:36
Gone. Just gone
Freya llangorse school
10:36
The sky exploded.
Louis SWW
10:36
Silence.
Mr F
10:36
Jack E, I like the way your protagonist doesn't have a choice in the matter. It makes the reader want to know why there isn't a choice. Excellent.
Mrs Collins
10:36
Gwen - you make me wonder what were you running from?
India (Pensby Primary)
10:36
I was thrown across the room. Blood poured our of my knee and I stung all over.
Fran
10:36
Slowly, I turned around dreading what I would see.
Edith
10:36
As soon as I caught my breath a started to run after the car.
Mrs Kilgour
10:37
India - have a little re-read before you hit send ... should it be out?
Mrs Collins
10:37
Niamh - try to remember to use punctuation.
Mrs James
10:38
Edith - love the idea of you having to catch your breath.  Where does the comma go?  Read aloud you might want to change a for something different.
Mrs Hughes
10:39
Robyn, use a capital for your own name, please!
Chloe -SWW
10:39
There was blood and glass every where.....
Larraine H
10:39
Tallulah    Great idea - just need to edit the word one - did you mean gone?
Olivia st Teresa’s
10:39
A GHOST!!!!! IIIIVVVYYYY!!!!!!! NOOOO!!!! The ghost had taken Ivy.
CJ of CJS
10:39
I saw granite pillars surfacing from a rocky hilltop with arches joining them with elaborate carving. Someone came up with it and cast a fireball down the uneven path. “Run!!!” Avear opened his eyes, staring blankly at the Royal Guard. “Come on, run.” He finally registered the sentence. He grabbed his sword and scabbard. What was wrong? He sprinted out of his place in the gatehouse. He could smell smoke.
Maggie SWW
10:39
Fingers trembling and my ragged clothes stained with blood, I ran of into the night.
Phoebe 11 RJS
10:39
But then, something curious happened, it moved past her without batting an eye in her direction. "What am I?" said Erin to herself.
Mrs James
10:39
Jack and Hannah - Fantastic - the idea of the road disappearing.  Great idea.  Well done.
Fran
10:39
Help!
Gwen, South Kilvington
10:39
It all started going wrong after we went to the cottage...
Olivia
10:39
She had no idea where to go as she couldn't move her legs with utter fear. What will she do? Where will she go?
Sam SwW
10:39
The hut burst into a great inferno as Zarus crouched within, fearing the shadow-stalking figures who had released the tongues of flame.
Beabop
10:39
I ran to the door, but they had already gone.
George Llandogo
10:40
I could smell the musty scent of someone's breath standing over me, knife pointing at my neck.
AvatarDavid Mitchell
10:40
Well done everyone! Some cracking writing.
Mrs James
10:40
George, this is very scary!
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