You are viewing the chat in desktop mode. Click here to switch to mobile view.
X
6A Writing
powered byJotCast
View Full Chat Next Page
Mr Warr
9:16
Imagine you are walking through this setting. Think about using your senses to describe it!
Lillia and Finley
9:18
The forboding trees towered above me as the mist squeezed every last breath out of my lungs.
Mr Warr
9:19
I like you use of foreboding, it creates a great atmosphere. Could you add a sentence to describe how you felt next?
Chloe and Thomas
9:19
I walked into the misty, damp, undergrouth woods.
Mr Warr
9:20
I like your description of misty and damp. The last part of your sentence doesn't quite make sense. What could you say instead?
Hannah
9:21
The gloomy setting covered my eyes ,blocking my path. The seasonal leaves dropped from above me ,covering the ground.
Mr Warr
9:22
I like your use of seasonal leaves, does a setting normally cover your eyes?
Chloe M & Toby
9:22
The gloomy forest eyes watched us as we cautiosly weaved our way in and out of the trees.
Mr Warr
9:24
I like the idea of eyes, it makes it seem as if you are being watched.
Phoebe and Theo
9:22
As i gazed through the vast terrain, i could see a faint mist coming towards me.
Mr Warr
9:24
I love your use of the word terrain. Can you describe this mist coming towards you?
Lillia and Finley
9:25
The gnarled trees intimidated me. Was I safe?
Mr Warr
9:27
I like the adjective gnarled, it creates a vivid description.
Jasmine, William
9:25
The cold breeze tickled my spine, whilst the misty forest, transformed into a horror movie.
Finley,Arran
9:26
It was a deep and dark forest with blood red leaves tumbling of the trees into the thick and gloomy mist.
Mr Warr
9:27
What do you mean by tumbling of trees?
Ryan & Sophie
9:27
The tree branches swung viciously, they violently created bruises on my face...........Was I alone?
Leyton and Lili
9:28
As we took  first steps into the forest we could hear the leaves crunching underfoot.We could see the stumbling trees upon us.
Regan, Freya
9:29
As I jumped in the pumpkin-orange leaves, ash clouds infested the smokey air,
Chloe and Thomas
9:30
We could say something like, I tumbled into the damp, misty woods as the trees swayed above me!
Mr Warr
9:32
You have now found this house, can you describe it?
Jake and Harry
9:32
Towering trees loomed over me, as a misty fog covered my vision.
Lily and Finn
9:33
As I tiptoed into the dark mist and fog before me ,I gazed up with the towering trees covering our eyes of our only hope of sunlight.
Jake and Harry
9:33
The towering misty trees loomed over me as I stumbled through the woods.
Chloe and Thomas
9:34
I stumbled into the haunted, mysterious house, ghost hovered me as if they were trying to take my soul. Why did I choose to come here?
Mr Warr
9:35
Great description here. Can you think about a word instead of haunted? Think about giving some clues to your reader?
Leyton and Lili
9:35
As we stumbled across the creepy house,my heart started to beat faster and faster, we panicked more as the time ticked.
Mr Warr
9:36
Can you show and not tell the panic of the character?
Joel + Evie
9:37
Olws hooted as I felt somthing grab my shoulder, I dashed out of the abandoned house screaming for my life.
Jasmine, William
9:38
Towering trees loomed over my house, covering my ominous, heartbraking view of the gloomy, dark clouds.
Mr Warr
9:38
Why was it heartbreaking? I love your description of the trees?
Phoebe and Theo
9:39
As I walk closer and closer i could see a top hanging from a crooked tree covered in red  stains: every small window was covered in pieces of dead trees .
Mr Warr
9:40
A great use of a colon here Phoebe and Theo.
Mr Warr
9:43
You are inside now!
Lillia and Finley
9:44
As I approached the weather-beaten house, freakish images invaded my thoughts.
Mr Warr
9:45
Great use of a hyphen here. Are you going to explore further?
Finley,Arran
9:45
There was a house with over growing trees witch had half of the amazon rain forest growing inside.
Mr Warr
9:46
Remember your homophone spellings for witch and which.
Lillia and Finley
9:45
I entered the room and gasped as I caught a glimpse of what horrors lay within.
Mr Warr
9:46
Brilliant, what next?
Connecting…