You are viewing the chat in desktop mode. Click here to switch to mobile view.
X
Descriptive Sentences 2
powered byJotCast
Prev Page View Full Chat Next Page
Mr Tinsley
6:16
Miles and Dom - Excellent use of vocabulary
Isla&Cossie
6:16
A green tunnel that shines like the sun as it opens the world of mythical creatures.
Mia & India
6:16
As the gental breeze blew across the track, the vibrant leaves fell onto the grass.
Harrison
6:16
the vibrant green bushes covered the old rusty train track
Leo & Charlie
6:16
The grassy , vibrant shrubs  that surrounded the track were green and beautiful.
Abigail and Izzy H
6:17
As they walked through the narrow, bamboo filled pathway, the beautiful symphony of bluebirds and robins filled their ears.
Mr Tinsley
6:18
Abigail and Izzy - Your sentence flows much better now!
Tom and Dan
6:18
Vibrant green leaves surrounded the track.
Kieran and Laurence
6:19
An unknown deep, dull pathway in a green jungle-like forest lead to nothing.As the trees slowly close in to the pathway a dark shadow surrounds the path.
Mr Tinsley
6:19
Kieran and Laurence - Comma?
Izzy and toni
6:19
As the wind trees cramped over the shining tracks, the birds  chirped in a sing song.
Luke and Callum
6:20
leaves and thorns sourrounded every corner .
Miles and Dom
6:20
I carried on down the twisting, winding tunnel as we passed a bundle of vibrant flowers. Then a skeleton leaped out of a tree and stared with caution.
Mr Tinsley
6:20
Miles and Dom - what did you do when you saw a skeleton? Surely you were scared?
Ruby and Ankita
6:21
Hearing voices as they got louder and louder they echoed from behind me. It suddenly started to get darker and darker. Then as I got to the end, a shadow appeared in front of me then said...
Mr Tinsley
6:22
Ruby and Ankita - check and edit your first sentence. Are you hearing voices echoing or are you listening to voices and then they also echo loudly?
Tom and Dan
6:22
A long sturdy track led down a narrow passageway surrounded by leaves led to a light.
Mr Tinsley
6:22
Tom and Dan - which was?
Mia & India
6:22
As I was walking along the old rusty track, I saw a light the was shining bright like the sun it was a ancient metal stem train racing towards me. Before I new it it disappeared it’s thing air and was gone in a blink of an eye.
Neve & Kacie
6:22
As our footsteps echoed through the leaves, we stopped dead in our tracks.It was an old, rusty bookshelf sat there waiting for its secrets to be unrolled.
Luke and Callum
6:23
The unknown track led to a gloomy field.
Kieran and Laurence
6:23
The vibrant, green leaves surrounded the track
Leo & Charlie
6:23
The path that was covered in leaves lead to a unknown dark room
Josh and Imogen
6:23
As we walked along the track, we saw the end what was going to be at there.
Abigail and Izzy H
6:23
At the sight of the end of the tunnel,  they all leaped and shouted for joy for they had been stranded there for days on end.
Luke and Callum
6:23
Turning every corner lurked a dark skeleton.
Leo & Charlie
6:23
The path led to a vibrant bundle of flowers which looked like a trap.
Miles and Dom
6:23
One of my friends ( Boris) charged at the demon of hell and just disintegrated
Mr Tinsley
6:24
Mile and Dom - a little bit of an anti-climax. You could've built some suspense and description about what happened
6:25
Izzy and toni
6:25
As I trampled through the vibrant forest, I heard footsteps running behind me
Kieran and Laurence
6:25
The vibrant, green leaves surrounded the deep, dark track that lead to an unknown piece of land which was a...
Abigail and Izzy H
6:25
As they stepped out of the path , the were transported to a mystical land of flowers and plants.
Luke and Callum
6:28
The rusty oil rigs stood  deep into the sea.
Mr Tinsley
6:28
Luke and Callum - Can you use a simile or metaphor to improve your sentence?
Neve & Kacie
6:28
As the waves crashed against the old, weak hideouts, rain was pounding and bolts of lightning struck the midnight sky.
Mr Tinsley
6:29
Neve and Kacie - great use of the verb struck
Leo & Charlie
6:29
As the sea was chipping away from the brown rusty old metal,but someone was laying beneath the stormy strong sea.
Mr Tinsley
6:30
Leo and Charlie - Check this. It doesn't make grammatical sense
Abigail and Izzy H
6:30
As the armies approached, the whole base began to panic -for they feared that the lives were about to come to a halt.
Connecting…