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Unannounced Carson Cistulli Awful Chat - 4/16/18
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Carson Cistulli
2:48
I appreciate your interest. I actually can't guarantee that they *will* appear. My role has changed a bit -- again, this is totally Dave Cameron's fault -- so the capacity to write as much has been compromised.
Moltar
2:48
How great of a factor was Jay Jaffe's moustache in the decision to hire him?
Carson Cistulli
2:50
Jaffe's moustache reveals what we have all already suspected: that Jay Jaffe is a "sly boots."
Guest
2:50
Did you make a spring training trip to visit your grandfather this year? My apologies if that's prying... I enjoyed the podcasts you did with him because they reminded me of my own visits to my departed grandparents. So that series was very enjoyable.
Carson Cistulli
2:51
That's not prying, no, and I appreciate the sentiment. Unfortunately, we were unable to visit this year because of the very demanding child we recently produced.
Tom
2:52
At what point in the season can we no longer claim SSS?
Carson Cistulli
2:53
Depends on the metric. Fastball velocity? It's like five pitches. A happy life? According to Solon, one can't claim to have had one until he's dead.
Post Malone
2:53
You're actually answering questions instead of thumbing your nose at the commenters so this is already an improvement over Dan
Carson Cistulli
2:54
To be fair to Dan, both his thumb and his nose are gigantic. When he's typing, it's basically impossible for him not to thumb his nose.
Guest
2:54
Any truth to the rumors flying around the world wide web that your wife has volunteered you for the next mars isolation project?
Carson Cistulli
2:55
I don't know. In the meantime, however, she's done a sufficient job of confining me to isolation on earth.
Rated Rookie
2:55
Why do you use the passive voice and subordinate phrases so frequently in your writing?
Carson Cistulli
2:55
I attempt always to preserve a level of formality so that I'm not compelled to reveal actual parts of my own self and feelings.
Anon
2:56
How does one reconcile the urge to build a life and seek stability with the urge to resist confinement and monotony? Also, can Chapman keep this up?
Carson Cistulli
2:56
At a certain age, the prospect of monotony becomes *very* appealing, as long as naps can be integrated into the day with some consistency.
Bosshog On Candy
2:57
Do you ever imbibe in the delicious beer fare of Maine and surrounding states i.e. Bissell, Austin Street, Foundation, or do you stick to wine like a lily-livered quisling?
Carson Cistulli
2:57
#Quisling4eva
The Hamburglar
2:57
Based on the question and answers, I see we're very much in a Carson Cistulli chat
Carson Cistulli
2:57
All too much.
Jeff
2:57
I don't really have a question, I just wanted to give a shout out to the Corey Kluber society. That's still one of my favorite things ya'll have ever done on this site
Carson Cistulli
2:58
I was merely a facilitator of that. Kluber provided all raw material.
Biscuit
2:59
Carson how do you identify potential "Fringe 5" players? Do you have a database that subtracts those ineligible, and then sort by a few preferred statistics?  Or is it more to do with being omniscient?  I assumed the latter but...
Carson Cistulli
2:59
I have a file on my desktop titled Fringe Machine. It contains many proprietary algorithms.
William
2:59
Sheryl Ring's article re: Mejia is well-crafted. Detailed, uses strong language when required, and enjoyable legalese. Bravo.
Carson Cistulli
3:00
Sheryl has extracted more content from the legal side of the game than I anticipated was possible.
Bosshog On Candy
3:00
Today is Tax Day, Cistulli. Have you properly allotted your peasant wages?
Carson Cistulli
3:00
Wrong! Wednesday is Tax Day.
3:01
Today is Patriots' Day!
Guest
3:01
Denial of personal comfort?  Don't get stuck on the process with Marcus Aurelius - the idea that we should first understand the nature of the people/world around us and then use that understanding to inform our approach to life is powerful, particularly in a world right now where so many people are unhappy for the basic reason that they refuse (sometimes on principle) to refine their expectations via an acceptance of reality.
Carson Cistulli
3:01
Yes! I agree!
Gallia erat omnis divisa
3:01
The imperfect seems better in this context.
Unlce Rico
3:01
This chat is truly awful.  Well done.
Foyle
3:02
Where does Dayn Perry store his lumber?
Carson Cistulli
3:02
In his cubby hole.
The Hamburglar
3:02
You're not going to be the next one to leave us, are you Cistulli?
Carson Cistulli
3:02
Who else would have me?
...
3:03
Okay. I have fulfilled my obligation to this chat. I appreciate your tolerance. Dan Szymborski will return next week.
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