JotCast | 13th May Show

13th May Show

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Emily,10

5:15

Hesitantly, with trembling fingers, she undid the string and peered inside...

Abigail northmead

5:15

Serum carefully lifted the parcel to her chest then there was huge gust of wind the train was here .

Louis SWW

5:15

Seren clutched the package, pondering if she should open it.

Rebecca From Bunel Class

5:15

Seren poked the box-like package and is jumped back...

St Vincent's School, Hull

5:16

Seren slowly, carefully, peeled off the wrapping.

Josh & Evie

5:16

The curiosity got the better of her.

Ted

5:16

As she h picked it up she heard a strange croaking.

LuisWRPS

5:16

Seren clutched the package. But when she looked doown, it was gone

Emma B

5:16

Seren didn't know what to do, open the parcel, or leave and get on the train.

Winnie - SWW

5:16

She stared into the distance but nothing was there.

Natasha f

5:16

Serum peered around, in the distance she hears her train she takes a look to see if she can see it...nothing.

Shreesha

5:16

He turn over the paper, nothing was written on it!

Mrs James

5:16

Shreesha - you have said the parcel is opened. How can you build up to the opening of it? This is a big event in the story and you may need to write it over a number of sentences in order to build tension.

Chloe -SWW

5:16

Then suddenly a small parcel flew to her face, but as she ducked and caught it, another screech came from the box.

Tilly-Ann

5:16

Seren needed answers, the noise in the package was too tempting, she knew the train was approaching and she may have company soon.

Joe

5:17

The lines began to shake

Pie

5:17

Keep working everyone.

Rose.W

5:17

The clock struck nine and Seren hered the swift chug of the train.

Isabella SWW

5:17

Violently the box shook as Seren stared at it.

David STBernaddetts

5:17

seren took the parcel

Edith

5:17

Seren then quickly shut it again.

Mrs James

5:17

Tilly-Ann. I very much like the sentence Seren needed answers.

Pie

5:17

Build up your paragraph!

Oliver screen sww

5:17

The next minute mum returned and Seren was so happy.Go on open the parsel.Bang.It's gone

Eliza W

5:17

From up in the sky, swooped down a dark cloaked creature. Too small to be a person. Too big to be an owl

Miraclea

5:17

Frightened, she walked over to the parcel and teared a corner. The edge of a book...

Sachi

5:17

She took a deep breath then began to peel back the corners, first top corner then the bottom, what she saw was unbelievable, she just could not believe it...

George Llandogo

5:17

Seren decided to grab the box and sprinted on to the train, and sat down on a seat. The box was making a fizzing noise as if it was alive, and suddenly a huge explosion could be heard...

Arthur

5:17

Seren grasped the package and sprinted onto the empty platform.

Ted

5:17

Gingerly, she set the parcel on her lap.

Nicola

5:17

And then, just as she had decided to abandon the parcel, it emitted a low hum.

Josh & Evie

5:17

Her grubby finger pulled the string.

Pie

5:17

Reread your first sentence to write the next sentence...

Olivia

5:17

With strong will power, Seren removed the package out of her site.

Olive

5:17

Suddenly 'creak' wooden door started to open and...

Amelia

5:17

Seren wondered wether or not she should open the mysterious package. Just then, the package made a noise. She jumped back, dropping the parcel. It ripped open...

wilfred

5:17

Her whizzing brain landed on the disition to open the parcel for its perfictaly wrapped paper seemed almost hipnotic.

Jacob

5:17

Thank you Mrs James

Annabel Lowe Rivelin School

5:17

At that that moment Seren heard the chugging of a train. Should she open it or go on the train.......

Rebecca From Bunel Class

5:17

All was still a horrible stillness a dark stillness.